New Music

July 31st, 2008 |

From time to time Dino will send me a drum loop that he has recorded and ask me if I can put some music to it. He sent me a new one a couple of weeks ago and I was messing around with it last night and came up with something that I think is pretty stinking cool.

Dino hasn’t even heard this yet so don’t tell him about it. I’ve left the drum loop out for now because it’s Dino’s loop and I’m not sure that he’ll like what I’ve put on top of it. So for now this is just the music I’ve added.

Click here to download the mp3.

For more examples of music that was made by me adding to Dino’s loops see this post.

Creatures of Habit

July 28th, 2008 |

Here is the transcript of a short conversation between Angel and me. This conversation took place right after we had put Riley to bed and plopped down on the couch to watch TV. Angel handed me the remote…

Angel: No baseball and no preaching.

Drew: (realizing the hopelessness of the situation hands the remote back to Angel) No America’s Funniest Home Videos and no Food Network Challenge.

Angel and Drew: Let’s just go to bed.

Camera Dump Day

July 27th, 2008 |

Yesterday we went to the Botanical Gardens because we thought that heat stroke and dehydration was a small price to pay to get to see some plants.

I am unable to save the kid from a sure spinal cord injury and carry this water at the same time – now hold this.

Riley learns that what goes up must get scared.

These are the trees that money grows on. Just ask Dale Chihuly.

Chihulyhulahoop.

This is why we can’t have nice things. The lady we bought Lilly from suggested that we get Lilly her own mattress to sleep on. We just so happened to have Riley’s old crib matress so we gave it to the dog. Here’s what she thought of that idea.

Riley had been drawing on the sidewalk with some of his chalk when Lilly decided to give it a taste. This was way funnier right before the picture was taken when she hadn’t yet licked off half of her pink mustache.

I Read Your Blog. You Bore Me.

July 25th, 2008 |

I’ve been blogging for about four years now and there is one thing that I hate about blogging.

A hypothetical conversation between me and a friend or family member.

Drew – Awww man I just got a new computer.

Person – I know.

Example number two.

Drew – Awww man I just finished this new song.

Person – Heard it.

Example number three.

Drew – Awww man we just took the funniest picture of Riley and Lilly.

Person – Saw it.

I am always amazed to find out who reads my blog. My readership has more than doubled over the past year which in turn means that I have absolutely nothing to talk about with more than twice as many people as last year.

The Dead and The Drugs

July 24th, 2008 |

We walked to the store tonight to pick up a prescription for Angel. We thought it would be nice to walk instead of drive because the weather was pretty tolerable but mostly because I’m fat again.

The quickest way to the store is to cut through the graveyard behind our house, so we did. Angel was pointing out the dates on some of the gravestones to Riley and explaining to him what they represent. After checking out quite a few Riley said “Almost all of these people have died.”

Maybe he just didn’t quite get it or maybe he has a sense for the undead.

When we got home with Angel’s drugs she was reading the possible side effects. She read them out loud. “Weight loss, decreased appetite, diarrhea, vomiting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Promises, promises.”

Deuce

July 22nd, 2008 |

Today I was a witness to an event few people will ever have the privilege of beholding.

I went into a Shell station this morning to use their restroom. There was one toilet and one urinal. The thing I needed to do required the toilet. While I was doing the thing I needed to do a man walked into the restroom wearing blue sweatpants and sandals.

From underneath the stall wall I could see him walk up to the urinal in a most conventional way. Then he turned around and faced away from the urinal in a most un-conventional way. Then I heard sounds. Sounds that would indicate a very highly un-conventional use of a urinal. Then I heard someone walk in the door and immediately walk out. Then I heard two flushes. Then he started over for another pass as it were. Then two more flushes and an exit.

Surely he didn’t just…

Upon exiting the stall I learned that oh yes he did.

For those of you who have never used a men’s restroom I might remind you that there is no toilet paper at the urinals.

I saw the guy in the parking lot talking to his family like nothing had ever happened. I imagine he’s going to have some splainin’ to do the next time his wife does the laundry.

A Few Thoughts

July 21st, 2008 |

If I see one more Cardinal reliever come in and go 0-2 on a batter and then susequently walk him I’m going to become a Cubs fan.

Grocery shopping on Monday evening is the most depressing way to spend money.

Who does my DVD player think he is always telling me that this operation is currently prohibited?

The “back” button on my mouse doesn’t work in Firefox or Opera. Always moving forward ’cause we can’t find reverse.

Riley wrote out the words to the Doxology tonight. Here’s what it said.

Praise God from who ma blessings flow

Praise him all creachers here below

Praise Him up of he hevenly host

Praise Father Son & Holy Ghost

On the back of the page was “Amen. Presbetierien song.”

A Good Idea Gone Bad

July 19th, 2008 |

Two, two, two posts in one day.

There’s this little guitar lick I’ve been working on as a picking exercise that I thought was kind of cool. I didn’t intend to use it in a song until today. So I sat down and put some simple chords changes under it and it immediately sounded ridiculous. It sounded like the soundtrack to the montage section of a bad 80’s movie.

I found it so entertaining that I went ahead and put a second guitar part on it and a rhythm section. This is so far from the stuff I usually write but it got me to laugh so I thought I’d share.

This is not really how I play the guitar but it was fun to wear that hat for a day.

Here’s the mp3.

Crooks for Christ

July 19th, 2008 |

Correction: After writing this post I realized that the offending network was the INSP Network and not TBN. However, TBN has its own set of heresies.

Now on to the original post.

I watch TBN a lot. The Bible tells us to “be angry, and sin not.” TBN always leads me to obey the first part of this verse. I am constantly stunned by the heresy that oozes from this network.

Mike Murdock (I refuse to link to his site) is a crook. He’s one of the leading salesmen for TBN. There are at least three different fund-raising telethons that play on an almost weekly basis on TBN of which he is the front man. His goal is to get you to plant a “seed” into the ministry of TBN. Specifically a $58 “seed” which should be planted monthly for twelve consecutive months.

I’ve heard him explain where he got the number 58 from but I don’t remember exactly what it represents. It’s something to the effect that he has counted 58 different kinds of blessings in the Bible.

During one of these telethons he says that God told him there are 300 people in the viewing audience whom God will bless abundantly if they will pledge $58 a month. He says that he doesn’t know exactly why God chose the number 300 but he just knows in his spirit that that’s the number of viewers God has called to give money to TBN. Here’s the deal though: this same “live” telethon plays at least once a week. The exact same one. They just rebroadcast it whenever they want. Does anyone see the problem with that? So are there 300 people that God calls every time this broadcasts? Or was it just the 300 from the original broadcast?

Murdock says that he is asking God for 1,000 miracles for these 300 givers during the following year. 1,000 miracles!!! That far outnumbers the miracles recorded in scripture.

During these telethons, when he’s not asking for your money, he tells these stories of how people all throughout the years of his ministry have witnessed incredible miracles in their lives after committing to plant this magical $58 seed. People were healed, people received incredible financial blessings, and unbelieving family members came to Christ only days after the first $58 seed was planted.

Does anybody remember Martin Luther? I do. The Reformation began with Luther protesting (among other things) the selling of indulgences by the Catholic church. These indulgences were essentially a fund raising effort by the Pope where you could buy your dead loved ones out of purgatory and into heaven. Murdock’s entire act smacks of this same wickedness.

And here’s another thing: Murdock is an Arminian. That means (this is a gigantic theological issue here that I’m not going to take the time to explain – I know many of my readers know the difference between Arminianism and Calvinism so I’ll just leave it at that) he believes that man is sovereign when it comes to whether or not he chooses salvation. So if Murdock believes that for $58 God might just save your husband, then that means the choice is God’s, not the husband’s. This completely refutes the entire basis of his theology. If man is sovereign in salvation then shouldn’t we send the money to the husband instead of God (read: TBN)?

I’ve also heard him encourage viewers to put the pledge on a credit card. Good grief!

Barf.

Now, let it be said that I have absolutely no problem with ministries (TV or otherwise) asking for money. Ministry costs money. I know that. But you will never hear MacArthur, Sproul, or Begg promising you a miracle if you support their ministry. And they usually stress the fact that you should support your local church first. Then if you are financially able to support their ministry, after having given to your own church, they welcome and appreciate your support because they don’t use advertising to pay for their radio time.

Thieves like Murdock (among many, many others) have done so much damage to Christianity and it’s sad. Now, not only does the public at large think Christians are crazy and foolish, they think we’re greedy. I dispise that.

Doyle Dykes and Guitars You Can’t Afford

July 17th, 2008 |

Monday night at the family birthday party for Riley I was talking to my uncle about guitars like we always do. He was telling me that he recently took his old Fender Jazzmaster to the guitar shop we both use to have some work done. A few days later when he went to pick it up, the guy who owns the shop handed him the case with his guitar in it and attached to the case was a certified check for $15,000.00. Someone had seen the shop owner working on the Jazzmaster and told him to offer the owner of the guitar this check to see if he would sell it. My uncle declined.

There are a number of guitars in my family that could bring that kind of money. In fact, the last time I picked up my guitar from the shop there was a pack of gum taped to the case. I declined.

My other uncle (second cousin actually, but I’ve always called him my uncle) just sent me a bunch of CDs featuring some truly outstanding guitar players. Doyle Dykes is one of them. Doyle Dykes is one of those guys who always shows up on the Internet as one of the greatest guitar players you’ve never heard of.

Check out this video of Doyle. I’ve never seen anybody use this string-bending technique before. This is really incredible.